But, it’s not the money.
I miss the clean sunshine in the morning.
I miss my lonely walk from home to bus stop, watching people going for their run, old people taking the dog for a walk, the ducks in the lake under the small bridge which I crossed every morning.
The occasional rush to not to miss the bus.
I had a bus stop much closer to my house. But, I never took that. Reason? I would have to wake up 10 minutes early for that and take the bus 20 minutes early. Plus, I would miss the walk.
I miss the casual ‘hello’ the elderly couple /strangers gave me there. I miss the warmth and helping feeling strangers gave to fellow people. No one grows suspicious if someone comes over to talk.
I can never imagine being happy about it here. Rather, I would be suspicious if someone hello’ed me here.
I miss the Starbucks cold coffee that we used to get at Lucky stores. I remember having gone at 8.00 at night, for that, when I messed up my SP Jain interview. It was all dark. All stranded roads and alleys. Of course, the place was not very up-market to be at that time of the day. I don’t think even Downtown used to be a suitable place to be at that time of the day, in US. But, I would remember the walk. Always. It was a milestone in my life. A major one.
I miss the Home Store. I remember wishing to have a home which I could decorate with all the pretty, silly things you could get for the patio. You could buy small flower pots, which would stay for a few days, and then die out. I kept a small one for some time. I am no gardener. I don’t think that’s a direction I would ever take, but I wouldn’t mind having an indoor plant, no maintenance, sometime.
Plus, the DIY option. Yesterday, I told Tarun I wanted to paint the shelf we had got made for our room. It’s not yet polished. He protested saying it gives out a very fowl smell as it uses spirit in varnish. So, I should not be doing that. I insisted. He said ‘Ok, you search on what all you need and you do it.’ He knows he’ll never let me do that, but wants to get rid of the current situation of argument. 🙂 He really knows how to tackle me. But, I sincerely loved the DIY option in West. There was a ‘The Home Store’ and one more…totally forgotten the name. It had all the locks n handles n stuff. If you lose a key, or need to change a lock, you got to do it all yourself. You cannot afford a keywala. You had to pick a key, put it in a machine, put another one which you want as a copy, and get the copy of the original made. So, pretty much everything you do in your home, you have to do it yourself. Now, how fascinating to be handling those heavy machines. Of course, you would be just pushing a button, but still. I think it would be great to feel in-control of those giant metals-pieces.
Now, it seems pretty fairy-tale to be building your own home and you may feel, that you would get tired of it. It’s much better when you can chose n pick what to do yourself and get things done by someone else otherwise.
But, don’t you think how beautiful your home would be if you did it all yourself?
There would be a bit of you in every part of your home. The paint, the fences, the decor, the wallpaper. And, you are not just an IT engineer who loses everything if the silly box called computer loses its importance. You would be worth much more. You would know how to ‘do’ something. Actually do something.
I miss the control on my life. I miss USA.